My task this weekend is to re-write what we have long called the Let’s Start Talking Guidelines. They are a list of non-negotiable behavior expectations that have grown up over the thirty years of our history.
For instance, we do not wish our workers to get involved with anyone romantically while on their mission project, so we have a No Romance policy. I hope this seems reasonable enough to you, but because we work with many college students and because being away from home creates an exotic ambience even for adults, this is one problem area that seems to surface every year!
There are only sixteen such guidelines in their current form, so it is not cumbersome, but over the years we have continued to revise them to the point that sometimes the primary expectation is no longer obvious. For instance, our No Romance guideline now reads:
“Dating team members is a major distraction to the commitment you have made with LST. Spend that love, time, and attention on those who need it in order to find Jesus. Romantic relationships with Readers will block their ability to find Jesus. Involvement with church members will create undesired problems. From our years of experience, this area is one of the most sensitive. Keep your focus on spending all of your energy sharing Jesus.
See how mushy this is! So let me tell you what my biggest problem is in this assignment. Maybe you can help!
I cannot find the right word! Which word or phrase will describe this important document in a way that is neither offensive nor condescending to both our college and church workers? Which word might perhaps even motivate or inspire them to full ownership? HELP!!!
Rules of Behavior is too authoritarian, but Guidelines sounds like The Ten Suggestions, which has no teeth. Standards does not ask for commitment, but Commitments is a pretty strong word that makes people run for cover! A Code sounds military (just think about A Few Good Men), Pledges makes me reach for my wallet, and Promises evokes strains of The Wedding March! Where is Shakespeare when you need him??
As we talked about this in our office common room today, it was interesting to notice which personalities went for which words!
Wait a minute! Therein lies a clue! Outside of gross criminal actions, we live in a society where no one really wants anyone to infringe on their own right to make their own decisions about their own behavior!! Everybody wants to choose their own word!
How can we live in such a community? How can we live and work together? How can two walk together unless they agree—on how to describe the mutual expectations to which they are willing submit? I begin to think my semantic problem is a symptom of a spiritual problem!
After I finish my assignment, I’ll tell you some of the stories behind our guidelines, so you can consider them for your short-term mission project.
What word or phrase would you suggest I use?
Mark's Blog 
Could you refer to them as Expectations you have for your workers based on your experience?
I like your second sentence for the title: Non-negotiable Behavior Expectations.
Or they could just be called “rules”…. ’cause that’s what they are. 🙂
I don’t think people resent “rules”, I think they resent baseless or arbitrary rules. And since LST’s rules are neither of those, people shouldn’t have a problem with them—or with the syntax used to communicate them.
I’m aware that my opinion could be called naive and/or simplistic. But that’s OK. 🙂
Always love your posts and love the office discussions even more!
When I was part of a short term mission program (1 1/2 years) we were called upon to make the same commitment, and I am currently a coordinator for an Adventures In Missions team that has this commitment as well. I agree with it, and can say from both sides of the guide book that it just makes great sense, most especially in foreign fields and cultures, which is your emphasis.
Generally, my observation and personal experience was that those of us who saw it as a commitment we were making to God and His mission had a far easier time than those who saw it as a rule they had to obey. I think that’s because one is an external force meant to conform your behavior (rules) versus an internal decision to make a personal sacrifice for a greater good. That also makes accountability (an important part of the equation) more effective, because then we aren’t accountable to just a rule (because our current culture doesn’t value what it sees as “just rules” too much), but to our own conscience and character.
Expectations?